Why Current Mental Health Practices Aren’t Addressing Your Needs
This year marks the seventh anniversary from when I originally started working in the mental health profession. Since then, I have met hundreds of therapists with a diverse array of multicultural backgrounds and skillsets. I have worked with world-renowned researchers and clinicians. I have learned and trained under the best mental health practitioners in the business. I have seen and done it all.
And today, I want to share with you a hard truth: most therapeutic relationships fail. I know, I know. As a professional counselor, that probably is not the most prudent assertion for me to make about the mental health field. Nevertheless, I feel confident in sharing the three primary reasons why most current mental health practices are insufficient for addressing your current needs, and what can be done to get you to where you want to be in your personal and professional lives.
The Echo Machine
I might burn some bridges by saying this, but the counseling profession is incredibly self-indulgent and self-congratulatory. I dare you to Google research studies about mental health practitioners and count how many published articles are written by therapists about themselves. If Narcissus were alive today, I am pretty sure he would be a counselor.
I believe that counselors remain within a bubble because they do not know how to appeal to the masses. It is incredibly easy for a counselor to win over someone who has already bought into the therapeutic process before they have even started. But encouraging a skeptic to try counseling is an entirely different story.
As a former engineer, I cannot tell you how many engineering and cybersecurity clients have come to me after seeing multiple therapists and feeling extremely underwhelmed and frustrated because their past therapist did not understand them. A novice counselor seeks to teach clients their way of thinking. A proficient therapist collaborates with their client to bridge the gap between their individualized past experiences/thought process and the philosophical principles of the mental health profession.
Insufficient Training
The terminal degree for a Licensed Professional Counselor is a master’s degree. Over a course of approximately three years, master’s students learn the fundamental principles of how to assess and diagnose a client’s mental health symptoms, how to conduct a counseling session, and how to implement fundamental counseling techniques in their work. Unfortunately, this three-year time frame is insufficient to fully grasp and comprehend the nuances and complexity of professional therapy. Allow me to illustrate.
Suppose a counselor is working with a client struggling with agoraphobic tendencies. A therapist with minimal training will utilize a cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) approach that seeks to challenge their client’s maladaptive behaviors. They may encourage their client to gradually expose themselves to the outside world, praise their client when they undertake a task that they personally approve, and judge the success or failure of their work based on their client’s actions.
But true counseling work is so much deeper than just getting a client to do or say something at a specific moment in time. My primary goal is not to push you in a specific direction of my own choosing. Rather, I want to help you become a version of yourself that you admire. I accomplish this feat with my clients by hearing their personal stories and thought processes, reflecting upon what knowledge and resources I have to offer that align with their subjective worldviews, and both my clients and I building a strong relational connection with one another.
Therapist and Client Mismatch
This last one stings. Sometimes things just do not work out because the therapist and client are a bad match for one another. I sincerely believe that counselors should be open, authentic, and upfront about their counseling style and the therapeutic process. On the flip side, clients must also be motivated and intentional to effectively utilize their allotted time during their weekly therapy appointments.
If both the counselor and client can honestly say that they have given it their all and things still are not working, then the most likely explanation is an incongruence of personalities. My clients appreciate my counseling style of being empathetic, methodical, and blunt. But I am not for everyone. And that is okay, because every client deserves a counselor who can relate and connect with their life story and thought processes. Being honest with your counselor about what is happening within the therapeutic relationship dynamic may help both you and your counselor uncover if your working relationship can be saved, or if it is time to cut ties and seek a better match elsewhere.
How to Make Professional Counseling Work for You
My intention in writing this blog post is not to intimidate or discourage you from starting your therapeutic journey. Professional counseling is an investment of time, money, and effort. I want to be upfront about what you are getting yourself into, and encourage you to consider what is within your power to make counseling work for you.
If you are seeking a counselor who desires to meet you where you are at, who will strive to share his knowledge in a manner that resonates with your perspective, and who will be upfront and honest about what he sees as the primary hurdles impeding your personal growth and relationship goals, then I am your guy. And if not, I hope you are able to utilize this information to find a therapist who is better aligned with your present needs.
Together, let’s determine if we can create a strong, collaborative working relationship.
Click on the link below to schedule a free 15-minute phone call consultation for either my Dallas or Flower Mound counseling offices.